


Walk Away, You Won't Get Far

by KaiserAlbrecht



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Shameless Smut, Tails, Thumb-sucking, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Why Did I Write This?, sin - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 13:47:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21357220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaiserAlbrecht/pseuds/KaiserAlbrecht
Summary: And it had all been going so well.An unexpected button press lands both the blue cleric and the ginger wizard in hot water as they're trapped in room together with no way out. Can they find their way out? Or will the tension between the two have them work out their troubles in a different way?
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 4
Kudos: 104





	Walk Away, You Won't Get Far

**Author's Note:**

> Oh man. My first fic post. Hope I don't fuck this up. Anyway, to keep this short, enjoy this awful, awful smut. I feel almost ashamed of myself.

And everything had been going so well too.

It had been another fairly uneventful day in the Happy Fun Ball, exploring and generally causing trouble both for the native inhabitants and themselves. Jester was the one leading the charge, happily skipping ahead of the rest of the group all the while whistling a chippy tune to herself. Despite the drab, plain stone walls surrounding the Mighty Nein, she still seemed so full of cheer and enthusiasm. 

“Keep up you guuys~!”

A few of the other members of the group all shared concerned glances with one another. This place was a literal deathtrap, with traps and ambushes built into almost every corner.  
“Miss Jester” Caduceus called out. “Maybe you should stick a bit closer. We don’t want you to get lost after all.”

“_Ja_. I agree with Caduceus. Running ahead doesn’t seem safe.” Between keeping his eyes out for potential trouble, Caleb did occasionally sneak a glance over at Jester. Her boundless energy and positivity was still something he just couldn’t understand. 

_‘If anyone deserves positive thoughts, it isn’t you’_

Shaking away his troubled thoughts, he noticed rather quickly once Jester had stopped and seemed to be staring at something jutting out of the wall. Narrowing his eyes, he couldn’t quite see from here, but Jester was staring right at it with one finger on her lips in a contemplative stance. Picking up his pace, Caleb began to quickly move towards the blue tiefling.

“Guuuys! Look at this cute little button!”

The rest of the Nein began to pick up their pace as Jester reached out for the button. Now that Caleb was closer, he could see that it was indeed, a button. Embedded into the wall was a small, pink, heart-shaped button.

And with Jester staring at the button, the wizard realised how much trouble they were in potentially. After all, Jester wouldn’t be able to resist pressing such a harmless looking and cute little button.

“It’s even shaped like a heart!” Almost on cue, she reached out and pressed it, just as Caleb reached her and tried to pull her away. They both became aware that a mistake had been made a few moments later. The sickly smell of ozone began to fill the air and both the cleric and the wizard could feel their hair begin to stand on their ends. 

Then everything went black.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sensation of shifting weight on his chest was what stirred Caleb from his unconsciousness. Something heavy… and warm. Opening his eyes, he was greeted by the sight of the blue cleric, unconscious atop his chest. 

It had only been a few seconds, but he could already feel his face begin to redden. She was so close. Her dimpled cheeks, her cute button nose and not to mention her full lips. As the next few moments passed in silence, he almost had to tear his eyes away from her. 

Gritting his jaw as he did so, Caleb finally took a moment of mental acuity to fully take in wherever Jester's haphazard button pressing had taken them. It was only what could be described as a study/bedroom, with bookcases,a large bed, a desk and the like. 

And as he lay there, his thoughts couldn't help but begin to wander.

_She smells like cinnamon…_

He now had to keep a conscious effort to stop his eyes from drifting back to her. He could feel each rise and fall of her breathing, making him more aware of her than ever before.

He felt her shift on top of him, hitching his breath. He was trying his very hardest to keep his internal thoughts from turning into action. To reach out and caress her cheek, lock eyes and give themselves to one another.

_‘This is dangerous. I can’t be thinking like this. She doesn’t even think of you that way. Who could love a murderer like yo-'_

“Cay...leb?”

He was shocked out of his thoughts, turning back to her. As he did, he was struck by how… different Jester looked under this light. He could feel a burning sensation deep within his chest, pounding to get out, like some chained beast.

“Are you okay Jester?” Were the only words he could manage. Even then, it felt like he was resisting some kind of magnetic force, pulling him closer to her.

“Yeah… I’m all good!” That momentarily shaky tone of hers had vanished, replaced by her ever happy smile.

“But _Cayleb…_” The way she almost whispered his name caused his gooseflesh to rise all over his body. He could just reach out and touch her. Feel her warmth. Taste her lips upon his-

_‘Focus. You’re not supposed to act like this. It’s like you’re a boy with no control over his desires.’_

“I think I read about this happening in one of my romance novels…” With one finger, she began tracing circles on his chest in a small gesture.  
Jester almost grinned as she looked up at Caleb’s face. She’d never seen him as red, and he was trying his hardest to avert his eyes from hers as she continued teasing him. But as she looked at him, she could feel… something. She wasn’t sure if it was the positioning, but she suddenly became acutely aware of how… _attractive_ he was. His cute little chin which she’d remarked on before. Although his jaw wasn’t as chiseled and gruff as other people’s, it was enough to send small shivers down her spine. The colour of his hair, now that he’d been clean for a while, was _beautiful_ to stare at.

Whereas a moment ago she was more than willing to tease and poke at their resident wizard, now she was a little confused at the feelings she was experiencing in the moment. Whatever she was going to say, she stopped, no longer feeling quite confident enough to continue.

“Should… should we look around? I think we’ve been teleported to another room.” Caleb could barely speak at the moment, too overwhelmed by this strange sensation in the air. 

“Y-yeah! You’re so clever Caleb.” Jester quickly pushed herself off of Caleb’s chest. “Do you think there’ll be another little heart button?”

Rising from the ground himself, Caleb brushed himself off and gave out a little sigh. “I’d hope so blueberry. The others might struggle to find us otherwise. There aren’t any doors after all”  
It was true. A brisk look around the room confirmed that not only were there no doors in or out of the room, but there weren’t any windows either. It was a locked off room.

As Caleb began making his way around to the bookcases (as he was want to do), Jester approached the desk and began rifling through. Ever so often, they would both glance at the other, then break contact and continue with their searching.

It didn't take long for Jester to come up disappointed with her lack of results. Frowning, Jester could only stare down at the desk in disappointment. 

Stealing another quick look over at Caleb, she couldn’t help but have her thoughts run wild with the two of them starring in the main roles in one of her smutty books. Having him grasp her so firmly from behind as his hands trailed further and further down... 

“See anything over there?” Craning her head, she could see a book in one of his hands whilst his other hand traced arcane sigils in the air, quietly muttering to himself. His eyes flitted over to her, giving her a small smile as he continued muttering the verbal aspect of his spell.

Boredom was beginning to set in for the blue tiefling, so she rushed over to the bed and did the only thing she could think of. 

Test out its bounciness by jumping on it repeatedly.

Her ‘testing’ showed that yes, the bed was not only very bouncy, but also quite soft as well.  
“Done yet Cayyyleb?”

The wizard didn’t raise his head from the book he was immersed in, only casually waving one hand around several other books he’d scanned briefly. “Almost. Most of these books are just unrelated to our problem. _‘The Various Applications of the Charm Spell’, ‘The Mage’s Guide to Interior Decorating’_... There’s nothing really helpful here. All I can really find is that we’ve been shifted to ‘The Bedroom’ on the map. There are a few scraps of paper tucked away in some of these."

Jester couldn’t help release a gasp of excitement as she kept bouncing, covering her mouth with one hand.  
“Does that mean this is where wizards get it on? Do wizards even bang? Aren’t they like, suuuper old?"

“Ahem.” Caleb coughed into his hand, feeling a reddening on his cheeks. “_I’m_ a wizard, remember?”

“Yeah, but you’re a cool wizard! You’re interesting and you aren’t crusty and old. Just a little smelly sometimes.” Kneeling down on the bed to reach eye level with the now-embarrassed wizard, Jester couldn’t help it as a sly grin snuck across her face. “If you made a Super Happy Fun Ball, would you have a banging room?”

“I...um...uhh…” Caleb had been reduced into a spluttering, blushing mess, incapable of stringing more than a few words together. The cool, collected and smart wizard was nowhere to be seen. He was stammering like a lovestruck teen.

“I-If I saw the need for it… then _Ja_.” He was painfully aware of how he was the focus of the little blue minx’s attention at the moment and there was no wiggling his way out of it. “I… wouldn’t have many people to… _take_… to such a room…”

“Lots of ladies like wizards! I’m sure you could get a few people in there. And if you’re ever lonely in your banging room, I could give you some company... If you’d like that…” Jester was fully aware of the implications, but she didn’t really care anymore. She felt like maybe she should just… let it all out.

“Jester… I don’t know what you-” He tried to speak, but she quickly placed one finger on his lips, silencing him. Now that she was touching him, she could feel how incredibly warm his lips were. He looked down at her with such a soft look, Jester thought she’d just melt under his gaze.

Both her hands reached out, cupping the sides of his face as she drew in closer. Her voice was but a heavy whisper. “This is okay isn’t it?... You’ll let me have this little moment…” It didn’t seem like she was talking to him, just muttering aloud to herself.

Once their lips connected, it seemed like Caleb was putting up no form of resistance, just limply accepting the sudden turn of events. Breaking the kiss, Jester frowned. “Do you want me to stop?”

“.... _Nein_.” All it had taken was the kiss from Jester to shatter any of Caleb’s remaining resolve. That same sensation was pounding on the inside of his chest. Feeling the heat overwhelm his senses, he leant in and returned the kiss with greater force, taking Jester by surprise. Her lips tasted so much sweeter than he could have expected as he greedily drank her in.

As their lips remained locked together, hands inevitably began to roam. Jester almost gasped as she felt Caleb’s hands begin to slide down her waist, coming to a stop at her hips. It was like his touch was electric, the shivers he was causing. 

Breaking from the kiss for just a moment, a string of saliva joining still joining them, Jester’s lips curled up into a sultry grin. “Cay~leb.” She savoured the taste of his name on her lips. “You’re being so forward!” One hand snaked out and grabbed the front of his jacket and pulled him forward. Caleb was taken by complete surprise and was at the mercy of Jester’s superior strength. Her voice was a heavy whisper as she pulled him on top of her. “But I can be forward too~.”

And now it was Jester’s hands that begun roaming. First sliding down the nape of his neck, then over his shoulders and down the front of his chest. Caleb might not have been muscular (a fact that he reminded the group of regularly), but she didn’t mind. When she thought of a muscle-bound Caleb, she couldn’t help but think how _strange_ that image was. Not that she’d mind if he gained a little extra muscle...

She could feel his warm breath on her neck as he panted, practically an animal. Everything else was blocked from her sight as he was mounted atop her. It was just Caleb. Only Caleb. He was all that really mattered. 

Caleb moved his hands to her ass, giving a firm squeeze. He’d be lying if he said that he’d never snuck a glance, but the large, frilly outfits she wore never really showed off her ‘assets’. Her neck arched as he touched her.

But even now, he could still feel that voice in the back of his head. Reminding him that he was a murderer, that she was too innocent for him. But he was in no mood to listen to his conscience at the moment. Not when all his thoughts were utterly overwhelmed with lust and desire. 

“One moment _Liebling_.” Quietly muttering into her ear, Caleb pushed himself up and began shedding his unnecessary items of clothing. Which would be all of them. Biting her lip, Jester began removing her own clothing, still underneath him.

It only took a few moments before all of their clothes were in a heap on the group. Caleb could feel her tail snake around his ankle. Staring at her naked body made him want to take her then and there. She was like a piece of art, and he was worried that if he touched her she might shatter. And the look on her face… _‘Gods. She’s almost too much.’_. Cupping one side of her face, Caleb trailed his other hand down her body. If he wasn’t so aroused, he would have been shocked once she took his thumb into her mouth and began sucking on it. 

His roaming hand came to a stop just atop her beautiful, blue pussy. He delicately began rubbing her clit with one of his fingers. He could see her entire body shiver slightly and the sucking of his thumb stopped, as Jester released a low moan. “Ahhnn… _Cayyylebbb~_…” 

“Shhh blueberry. Let me take care of you for once.” She nodded weakly, before he continued. She was wet now, and he could tell. Her legs were squirming as she writhed underneath him, her thighs rubbing together. Taking the initiative, Caleb gently inserted his finger into her and felt her stiffen up. He started softly, but slowly began increasing his ferocity. She was slick, her juices coating his finger. 

Each breath she took was deep, every other sound was a moan of pleasure. Her legs were writhing together even more, trembling slightly. He could feel her pussy tightening around his finger. “Cayleb… I can’t… I’m gonna…” The pleasure peaked and exploded as she arched her back and cried out.

She was wracked with waves of pleasure. Was this what all those heroines in those smutty books went through? It was one thing to read about it, but to experience it was another thing entirely. After a moment, she relaxed, panting heavily.

Climbing back up to get face-to-face, Caleb couldn’t help himself from grinning at seeing how the cleric had completely fallen apart at his hands. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes unfocused. “How was it Liebling?” 

“Haaahhh… no…. no fair...“ It took a moment before Jester managed to collect herself, still trembling slightly. “... Now _I’ve_ got to look after you, and you seem to be way more experienced than me!”

_ _Shaking his head, Caleb could only chuckle. “Still thinking of others in a moment like this. That’s exactly why I fell in love with you.” It was no secret he liked to keep his secrets to his chest. He was truly awful and he had his reasons. But with Jester like this in front of him, his entirety was laid bare for her to see. And he wouldn’t stop her._ _

_ _“Is… is that true Caleb?” Her breath hitched at the sudden confession. She could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks as he smiled down at her. “Do you… really love me?”. For a moment, she felt a little unsure. Was he feeling pressured by her? Did she force him into this by kissing him?_ _

_ _“Of course” He intertwined his fingers with hers, feeling her soft hands against his own. “I have a lot of secrets. But it is no secret that I love you. Always so cheerful. Always caring and looking out for others. You’re too good for someone like me.”_ _

_ _Jester could feel tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. Such a heartfelt confession from Caleb almost brought her to tears. “Oh Caleb... what else can I say to that, except that I love you too?” In one quick movement, she wrapped her arms around him, drawing him in. His warmth was comforting and filled a void she didn’t even know was there._ _

_ _They stayed there in silence, embracing each other until Jester pulled back a little. “Cayleb?” A small grin was creeping up one side of her face, no doubt she had some fiendish idea._ _

_ _“_Ja_ blueberry?”_ _

_ _“Can I show you how much I love you?” There it was again. That sultry tone that practically oozed raw sexuality. Caleb all at once realised that she’d found a new way of teasing him. _ _

_ _“What do you have in mind?” Raising one eyebrow, Caleb began suddenly aware of how turned on he was. He’d put it aside as he confessed his romantic feelings, but his erection was still there, stiff and angry. He found himself sharing Jester’s little smirk._ _

_ _With a cute little spin, she spun around on the bed so that she was now laying face down on the bed. His eyes traced their way down her back, past her full hips and settling on her perfect ass. He couldn’t help it as he let out a small grunt as he got even harder.  
“Do you want to fuck me Cay-leb?” Her tail swished back and forth in the air like a dog about to receive a treat, occasionally brushing his cock. She wiggled her ass and Caleb was almost completely mesmerized. _‘How can someone be so perfect?’__ _

_ _“_Ja_. Gods I do.”_ _

_ _“Then come and get me.” Each swish of her tail was like a metronome, hypnotising him. He could feel that same feeling, that burning in his chest. Only this time, it was his entire body. He wanted her and he couldn’t hold back any longer.  
He reached out and grabbed the base of her tail, using it to drag her closer. Jester let out yet another sensuous moan as her tail trembled in his grasp. His cock was now resting just between her asscheeks, hot and stiff._ _

_ _“Hnnn… Caleb, don’t tease me!” He rubbed his cock against her, continuing to torment her. Seeing her squirm in anticipation only made him harder. Having her at his mercy like this felt… intoxicating. It made him feel strong, virile even. "Do I have to beg for it?"_ _

_ _His smirk was her only response. She kept rubbing and grinding herself up against his dick, but anytime she got too vigorous, Caleb pulled back slightly, still denying her the pleasure she so wanted.  
"Please Caleb! Please fuck me! I can't wait any more!" She looked genuinely worried. The tension was building in her and it had to be released somehow._ _

_ _"Well, I can't leave you waiting, now that you've asked." Positioning himself, he could see she was still as wet as before. Slowly, he pushed his tip inside of her, feeling her tightness wrap around his cock. Gripping the base of her tail a little firmer and using it as leverage, he quickly pushed himself into her up to his base. He couldn't help but let out a low, guttural groan. "Gods Jester… you're so perfect…"_ _

_ _Licking his lips, Caleb pulled back from her, feeling her juices on his shaft. Then, he thrusted forwards again, this time with a little more force. Jester let out a moan, her tail trembling. He began to draw back and thrust back into her with increasing speed and ferocity, each thrust shaking her add from the force._ _

_ _Jester had never experienced anything like… _this_. And she'd not expected Caleb to be so vigorous! He was like a caged animal. She could feel his cock filling her with every thrust, his warmth spreading inside her. He was like a furnace. She could barely speak, each thrust took her breath away. "Let's cum together, okay Caleb?”_ _

_ _His only response was him speeding up, each thrust plunging deeper and deeper into her. Caleb could still smell Jester’s telltale scent of cinnamon, but now it was mixed with the heavy smell of sweat. The sound of moaning, grunting and skin smacking together filled the room. _ _

_ _Caleb could feel his climax approaching as Jester became suddenly tighter around him, gripping his cock. Then, with one shared moan between them, he thrust back into her, filling her. She could feel his heat spreading through her body. Finally pulling himself out of her, he took a moment to breathe._ _

_ _He however, was taken by complete surprise as Jester seized him by his arms and with a burst of strength, flipped him onto the bed, reversing their positions. Now he was the prone one and she had mounted him. Grinning down at the wizard, Jester trailed one hand over his chest. “You were enjoying yourself sooo much Cay-leb. Now it’s my turn to be a little forceful, kay?”_ _

_ _To her surprise, he was still hard. His cock stood to attention as she took it gently in one hand. "Jeez Caleb! I thought you were supposed to be weak? Have you been holding out on us?"_ _

_ _"_Nein_… It's just you make me feel so…" He pursed his lips in thought for a moment. "...so 'energetic'. And besides, I don't think I could use _this_-" He gestured down towards his erect cock. "-to help the group in any real capacity."___ _

_ _ _ _"That's okay Caleb,I was just joking." She gave him her own delicate smile, mirroring his, before she took on that impish grin of hers. "Now how about you lie there, and I'll help _you_."  
Straddling him, she placed his cock beneath her. Placing both her hands on his thighs for balance, she slowly lowered herself on his cock. Biting her lip, Jester could feel the familiar sensation of him slipping inside her _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _"Hnnn… Jester… you said you'd… never done this before?" Before he was the one in control. But now the position was reversed and he was definitely feeling it._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _"Shhh!" Even as she was pushing herself down further onto his member, she shushed him. "You're so-" Whatever she was about to say was cut off as a moan slipped out from between her lips "… you're so talky during sex Cay-leb! I'm trying to focus here."_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _An insidious thought crept into Caleb's head as Jester continued lowering herself onto his dock. He reached out and clasped both her shoulders. "Caleb, what are you-" She was cut off as he used whatever small amounts of strength he had in his thin arms to pull her down further. It helped that she was completely surprised. With one quick tug, she was pulled down, his cock now filling her once again._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _Biting her lip, she pouted at the smirking wizard. But she was still the one on top. Raising herself back up, she felt a small sense of victory as Caleb’s smirk disappeared, replaced by gritted teeth and groaning. She began rising and falling, rising and falling. Each time driving his swollen cock further and further into her, but now Caleb was the one feeling the strain. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _“Just had to… get into the flow, ya’know?” She had found her rhythm. He’d taken her by surprise once or twice, but now she had the initiative. Caleb’s hands reached out towards her, desperate to touch her, caress her soft skin. His rough, calloused hands gripped her thighs firmly, like an anchor. He felt like he could just float away from the pleasure._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _The fucking continued for _faaar_ longer than either expected. Both Jester and Caleb lay on the bed, panting and sweating, their entire bodies aching. Jester gently rubbed the base of her tail, feeling the tenderness as a result of Caleb’s forceful ‘manhandling’. And that wasn’t the only part of her that was a little tender. “Haaahhh… You could have been more delicate with my tail. Tiefling tails bruise easily you know!”  
He laid a gentle kiss on one of her horns, smiling in that soft way of his. “I’m sorry Blueberry. I got… a little carried away there. It’s just… It’s been a while for me, Ja?”_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _Jester didn’t know whether to feign surprise or to show her genuine surprise. There had been no sign of the quiet, shy wizard in any of that. “Those smutty books must be affecting you.” She nestled in against him, resting her head on his chest. "Not that I mind…"_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _“... _Liebling_?” Caleb asked._ _ _ _

_ _ _ _“Yeah Cay-leb?”_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _“We still don’t have a way out of here.”_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _“Oh. Well I can make us food, so we won’t starve.” And besides, their friends would come to get them...eventually. “We can just wait here for them to come get us.” She flashed him one of her sly grins. “We’ll just have to ‘take care’ of each other until then~...”_ _ _ _

_ _ _ _Aching and sore, Caleb still found himself sharing her smile. “_Ja_. That sounds good.”_ _ _ _


End file.
